Save Beyonce!

Once the world finishes ejaculating at the thought that world class Texas Turd George Bush will be flushed from office and Obama will take over, let them ponder the most pressing matter at hand today! We citizens of this shitty swirling globe are in danger of losing dear Beyonce Knowles!

Now she is not at risk of being whisked away by Martians, though if those wily green bastards had any sense they would beam her to their red planet and make her their mocha queen! Rather my great fear is that she is slowly slipping down the slope of diva insanity that has claimed so many songstresses before!

Diana, Liza, Judy, Michael, Britney...all those bitches succumbed to the pressures of fame and fortune and went bananas...and not the good kind of banana...the kind a young lady might experiment with when she masturbates...but the bad kind of banana...the kind a rogue Detroit cop might stick up law abiding peace officer's tail pipes while in the middle of an investigation!

I digress...watching ladies like Liza and Mariah go off the deep end troubled me not, cause they were and are talentless nobodies who weren't good looking! But dear Beyonce is legitimately beautiful, and thus better than most of the other 6 billion people on this planet, and worth saving.

Who could help but be charmed by the way she professed her love of Popeyes chicken! What sense! While putrid skanks like Britney kept flashing their oft abused twats Beyonce charmed with her winning smile and love of fine fast food.

While repulsive no talents like Britney dated refuse like K-Fed, dear Beyonce cavorted quietly around the globe with famed homosexual Jay Z, and wasn't it nice of her to provide that frilly pseudo gangsta with such a beautiful beard?

She even chose to give her fans the gift of her visage on the big screen, and although she starred in a relentless procession of crap like Austin Powers 3 and that Cuba Gooding movie, it was still nice to look at her.

Is there a more beautiful word than bootylicious?

Don't go over that psycho ledge Beyonce! This Sasha Fierce alter ego used to be somewhat charming, but easily dismissed, like your childish belief in god. Suddenly it has come to the forefront however, as if you are losing your mind completely!

Perhaps I should embrace this Barack optimism. Maybe this Sasha alter ego will go nutzo in the good way, and we can all look forward to dear Beyonce working onscreen with Kristin Kreuk in the some sort of Etta James pornographic bio. Did Etta engage in lesbian sex with a young half Asian Canadian? I close my eyes and hope so.