I went to the beach today. I was not raped.
I like to take pleasure from the little things in life...the golden rays of the sun warming my body, the fresh ocean air washing over me, the absence of buggery.
My joy was tempered at the realization that my dog has most likely been assassinated.
I suspect the neighbors. They have always resented his robust health and shiny coat. They have an assortment of skin conditions and their pet iguana died long ago and lies, dessicated and shriveled up, on their porch.
I detest my neighbors.
If they are reading this I hope they realize I urinate on their daily paper each morning...just a little bit, so that they have probably suspected it is just morning dew, and not my fresh, hot piss.
1 comment:
i killed yer dog by rolling up a cynide pill in a wad of meat and throwing it to him as though it was a delicious treat. i have always been jealous of his shiny coat and unflinching loyalty.
Post a Comment